Woman

Woman Jokes

A young Greek couple got married, and at their wedding... ...the mother of the bride took the bride aside for a quick chat.

"My sweet," she said, "you're now a woman. I'm so proud. Some advice for you now that you're married: Greek men are very particular, and at some point when you're making love to your new husband, he might suggest that you 'turn around,' if you know what I mean. If that sort of thing makes you uncomfortable, do not feel pressured to say yes."

The bride thanked her mother for the advice, and the wedding continued. That night, as she and her husband consummated the marriage, she was mildly surprised to learn that he never asked her to 'turn around.'

They spent a beautiful week together on their honeymoon and made love many times. But still, to her mild surprise, her husband never asked her to 'turn around.'

Their one year anniversary arrived, and they made love to celebrate the milestone. But again, to her mild surprise, the husband never asked her to 'turn around.' This continued for years: their second anniversary, third, fourth...

Finally, on their fifth anniversary, her husband started getting romantic with her in bed and said, "Honey, we've been married for five years. I was thinking we maybe try something new. I thought this time you could 'turn around,' if you know what I mean."

She replied, emphatically,"No! No, I do not do that, I am not that kind of woman!"

Without getting defensive, her husband simply said, "That's all well and good, honey. But I thought you said you wanted children?"

I cunt not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunt nots to believe there is nothing cunt do. BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck.

Why can't a woman find a glory hole inside of the lady's room? Because piss comes out of a woman's pussy

The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, “The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your p🍆nis.” 🥰

Was busy robbing a house as quietly as possible and saw a woman catching me in the act, decided to get her on the act and gave away my location from the noise

A blind woman told her husband someone is coming ,he asks how do know you cant see .she replies ,i can taste it.

I though it would be fun to become a shooter. It became less fun when I realized that shooting a woman up also included a condom.

Hi my name is unknown guy! Please join my group for the picture I show you, we will do this every week! Thanks leave a comment or sign in using the sign in sheet that I have in google forms or own the website. Hint: Pictures of woman. btw for men only!

motar is like a womans fanny the more you play with it the wetter it gets

my tutor just said this quote of 2k18 ^^^

pontypool is rough

A woman once false accused me for rape and I was sent to life sentence prison. PLEASE CONSIDER LAUGHING now 😂

If you argued that god was a woman 49.8% of the US population would try and raise Hell Just to ask the other guy. Talk about a male supremacist religion.

What do you call diareah from a hot woman Chocolate milk What do you call diarrhoea from a fat woman Arsenic

A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money. The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed. The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed. The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed. The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money,.....Then he married the one with the biggest breasts.

Yesterday, I saw an advert with random woman dancing, and someone said that they were beautiful. And then I said "Except the fat people." And then I got sent to my room for saying that.

The Police officer in London , Who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman , drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car , murder her and do whatever to her , has appealed against his Whole Life tarriff.

He should be relieved it was only that ! , could of been worse ... could of married her !