Woman jokes
Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high-ranking position in the US government?
Have we all forgotten that Monica Lewinsky was directly under Bill Clinton?
I wish death was in the form of a woman.
That way, it would never come for me.
What's black, white, and red all over? A nun on her period.
Why did God create women before men?
He didn’t want any advice on how to do it.
When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye.
So, she went to see the "You Should Be Shot" Photography Studio.
Nah I thought this was banned 😭
A woman having labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”
“Don’t worry,” said Doc to the worried husband.
“Those are just contractions.”
Why do women have two sets of lips?
I kiss both.
At the library, I got in trouble for putting a cooking book in the women's section.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A kinder surprise.
How did the lesbian die? Homicide.
I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.
Would you rather get a massage from a man or get major surgery from a woman?
How do you blind an Irish woman?
You put a bottle of Scotch in front of her.
What’s the difference between a woman and a mosquito?
A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
Why are Black women dating white men?
So their kids don’t have to worry about not meeting their father.
Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!
So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.
What did Adam say when he saw Eve?
Answer: "Woman!"
A team of cops and a news reporter are at a home where a violent crime has been committed. The head news reporter, in front of the camera, says, "A woman in this house has killed her husband because he stepped on the floor while she was mopping." He then turns around and asks a cop, "Has the woman been arrested yet?" The cop replies, "Not yet, we're waiting for the floor to dry."
What’s the difference between women and condoms?
There isn’t a difference; they’re both throw aways.