Woman jokes
For every dollar a man makes, a woman makes 70 cents.
That’s unfair! Now the man only has 30 cents!
Why can't women just shut the fuck up! I hate women. They need to know their place and stay in the kitchen and be baby makers...
I used to be a man in a woman’s body. And then I was born.
Why can’t Helen Keller have kids?
Answer: She’s dead.
I don't ever really bother women, but when I do, I usually just want to talk. I guess since I just so happened to be a straight male that's not a 10 or a 5, I get shutdown so fast. I put out lit candles...like damn, I thought I hid my ring.
What do autistics, women, and chinks have in common? They can't fuckin' drive.
What do you call women's rights: A blank sheet of paper.
I once got in trouble in the library for putting the women's right book in the fantasy section.
Why was Helen Keller so bad at driving?
Because she's a woman.
My woman told me that she wants to have sex with me, and I said, "Let's go at it." She said, "Shut up and kiss me on all my pillows."
What's cold, blue and makes women cry?
Cot death.
Wanna know something funny?
- Women's rights.
Women are like marshmallows because they are white, squashy, and we put our sticks inside you.
What's the difference between a woman and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?
A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.
I like wine how I like my woman.
4 year old locked in a basement.
An old professor’s class used to begin with a dirty joke.
Following one particularly vulgar joke, the girls in the class decided to walk out the next time he began.
When the professor learned of this planned protest, he came in the next morning and said, “Good morning, class. Did you hear about the scarcity of whores in Newfoundland?”
With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.
“Wait, ladies,” called the professor, “The boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”
What do you call an entitled woman? A Karen.
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
"Popcorn" means "Photo-Oxidant formation by Plant-emitted Compounds and OH Radicals in Northeastern Germany."
"HO" means a woman, in particular one who has many casual sexual encounters or relationships. So basically, popcorn is a woman in plant based sex encountered a lot in a nazi camp.