Woman jokes
A woman was in the Twin Towers. She orders a pepperoni pizza but got a plane pizza.
Abortion is beautiful.
Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?
A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.
What is a girl's favorite song when they are on their period?
"Period, oh period, oww!"
What do a fat woman and bricks have in common? They both get laid by Mexicans.
How did the lesbian die? Homicide.
wo(man) fe(male) we(men)
dishwash(her)
Why do women rub their eyebrows? They don't got balls to scratch!
What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a pregnant emo girl?
The emo girl still bleeds.
The phrase “Muslim women live in one of the hottest countries in the world and they can’t even expose their legs” has two meanings.
What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?
One’s finger-licking good and the other is just a fast food restaurant.
As a woman, why is your stomach bigger than your bums? 😒
When you see a woman with a leg chain, what usually comes to your mind?
Why are history teachers always women? Because they like to bring up the past.
Women treat me like a god.
They ignore me till they need something.
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."
Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"
"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
Two women, Jane and Emma, are in the afterlife waiting for judgement.
Emma turns to Jane and says, "I'm just curious, but how did you die?"
Jane replies with, "I burnt to death."
Emma, shocked, responds with, "That sounds horrible! What was it like?"
Jane answers with, "It first felt really hot and painful, but then I felt nothing. How did you die?"
Emma replies with, "Well, I believed my husband was cheating on me. I decided to leave work early one day to make sure he was loyal. I found him on the phone with his mother. I thought he was hiding something from me so I ran to the bedroom and found nothing. Then I sprinted to the kitchen and didn't find anything. I then jolted outside to the backyard and just found that he hadn't cleaned the pool. I was so tired from running that I fell over into the pool and drowned."
Jane retorts with, "Well if you checked the oven neither of us would be here right now."
I got kicked out of Social Studies class when my teacher made us watch a women's rights documentary. When he asked us what the genre of the film was, I put my hand up and said "Fiction."
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A kinder surprise.
What do you call a strong, independent girl in Haryana?
Dead.