Wildlife jokes
In Africa, a koala and a kangaroo were very thirsty. The kangaroo said that when they have no water, they dig a hole and water comes out of it. Then the kangaroo dug, and in one minute the koala asked if there was any water. The kangaroo said no, and the koala had to wait for many minutes. Soon water came out of the hole, and then the koala jumped into the hole and drank water. The kangaroo wanted water too, so he tried to pull out the koala, but instead, his tail got chopped off, and then they never became friends again.
How to catch Bigfoot: 1. Dig a large pit. 2. Build a fire in the pit and let it burn all the way to ashes. 3. Place small green peas all around the rim of the pit. 4. Hide in the bushes and wait. When Bigfoot goes to take a pea, kick him in the ash hole.
My grandfather had the heart of a lion,
and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
A man walks into the taxidermist with two monkeys. The taxidermist asked if he wanted them mounted. The man said, "No. Shaking hands will be fine."
I like zebras.
CUTEST DEER
I think I'm a red zebra!! Cuz I'm stripped red, iykwim.
Explain Bear weighs 1 ton.
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
What do you call a deer with no legs and no eyes?
Still no idea. 😂
What animal lies? A lion.
What did one squirrel say to the other squirrel?
"Stop staring at my nuts."
Q: What's the best way to eat a squirrel?
A: Open up its little legs.
The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave.
Why would hunting a bald eagle in America be a bad idea?
Because it's ill-eagle.
What do you call a bear with no ears? A b.
Yeah, that joke was unbearable.
In Australia, my jokes are high koala-ty.
Two men are hunting. One asks: "Did you ever hunt bear?" The other one answers: "No, but one time I went fishing in my shorts."
Why don’t cheetahs get married?
They always cheat on each other.
A puma was making another puma laugh. That puma that was laughing said, “Stop making me laugh! I’m gonna puma pants!”
Koalas are weird. Why? I don't know!