Wildlife jokes
What did the Cheetah say to the Lion?
"I'm a Cheetah!"
Why can’t monkeys play in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
What do you call a bear with no ear?
B.
What do you call an animal flouting?
Super bird!
Dawn rises on the Serengeti, and she has no idea as to how she got there.
7000+ bats.
What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?
"No, you ate my cock!"
What did the buffalo say to the buffalo's son?
"Bi-son."
I smell like skunk.
Why can't you do a Math test in the zoo?
Because there are too many Cheetahs!
Why don't people sit next to the cheetah during a test?
Because he's a cheetah!
Pigeons can be annoying at times, especially when their bones get stuck in-between your teeth.
What do you call a deer with no ear?
One ear.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course, houses can't jump.
What kind of bull doesn’t have horns?
A bullfrog!
A panda goes to see a hooker. He goes down on her, he mates with her, he ejaculates and then he attempts to walk away.
The working girl asks, "Aren't you going to pay me?"
She opens the dictionary to "Prostitute: One who sells sexual companionship for money."
The panda picks up the dictionary and turns to the definition "Panda: A marsupial who eats, roots, shoots, and leaves."
America... Amefrica... Amfrica... Africa...
In Australia, my jokes are high koala-ty.
Having sex in the woods and a deer walks up and fucks you from the back.
Oh, the monkeys in the trees, they dance and they play, Their fur so soft, their eyes so bright, they chatter all day. Their tails so long, their hands so fine, they swing and they sway, In the trees, they're the kings of the fray.
Their antics bring joy, their laughter so free, They're a delight to watch, as they jump and they spree. Their mischief is contagious, their fun so true, They're a treasure, a gift to me and you.
Their little hands so deft, their feet so light, They swing through the trees, with grace and might. They're a wonder, a marvel to see, A precious gift, a treasure to me.