A baby seal walked into a club.
What did the panther say at the poker party?
I'd be lion if I said I was a cheetah.
Africa.
What do you call 2 nudists in Africa?
Naked and Afraid.
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation."
Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.
The frog says $30,000.
The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.
Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.
The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000. He wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what the heck is this?"
The bank manager looks back at her and says: "It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
Why would hunting a bald eagle in America be a bad idea?
Because it's ill-eagle.
why does the orphan like nature, he can call someone mother
What does a gorilla attorney study?
The law of the jungle.
What makes a raccoon 🦝 very rich?
Its rings!
Imagine you are getting eaten by an alligator. What do you do?
Stop imagining!
Q:Why did the first Koala Fall off the tree A: Because it was dead Q: Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead too. Q:Why did the third Koala fall off the tree A: Because it was hit by the other two Koalas on the way down Q:Why did the fourth Koala fall off the tree A: Because it thought it was a game and joined in Q: Why did the fifth Koala fall off the tree A: Because it was curious to see where the others were going Q: Why did the sixth Koala fall off the tree A: It was tied to the fifth koala Q: Why did the seventh Koala fall off the tree A: Peer group pressure
I like zebras.
Me and my friend were duck hunting.
He shot 5 ducks in one shot. Then he shot by accident and yelled "DUCK!" then "MOTHERDUCKER!" Then ducks came down and one by one bit him.
How do you get a squirrel down from a tree?
You pull down your pants and show it your nuts.
What's the difference between a bison and a buffalo?
You can't wash your face in a buffalo.
I think I'm a red zebra!! Cuz I'm stripped red, iykwim.
A puma was making another puma laugh. That puma that was laughing said, “Stop making me laugh! I’m gonna puma pants!”
What's white, black, and red all over?
A zebra who walked into a hunting reserve.
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
What animal lies? A lion.
