When jokes

Man

A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.

The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

Dad

What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.

Coal

What do people get for Christmas when they behave badly? They get coal. Why coal, you're probably saying, because the true meaning is cucks of all kinds.

Woman

What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?

Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.

Memes

Power

When you tell her you are about to "COME," she says no, don't, please just keep going.

Shenron: THAT IS BEYOND MY POWER.

Momma

Your momma's so fat, when she pulls her knickers down, her ass is still in 'em!

Game

What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?

I spy.

Mama

Yo mama is so fat, when she was a spy, she was called "double obese."

Boy

A boy couldn't walk normally because his pants were huge, and when he went to school, the people there made so many jokes about him that he died.

IT'S NOT TRUE, JUST A FAKE JOKE, DON'T WORRY!

Mamma

Yo mamma so poor that when we went on a date, she took off her shoe laces and said "spaghetti."

Momma

Yo momma so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the floor cracked up.

Stephen Hawking

What happens to Stephen Hawking when he logs in to his account on Google when it says, "I am not a robot?"

Intruder

When a 68 year old teacher says: "I am going to tackle an intruder if I have to!"

Me: "Oh hell nah"

Liar

Mommy, mommy! Are we liars?

"Shut up and cross your fingers when you say that."