When jokes

Yo mamma so poor that when we went on a date, she took off her shoe laces and said "spaghetti."

When a 68 year old teacher says: "I am going to tackle an intruder if I have to!"

Me: "Oh hell nah"

A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.

The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

My Emo friend was coming over to my house. When he got there, he said, "Got a rope?" I asked why, and he said, "I want to make a swing."

What did Stephen Hawking say when he rode a bike?

"Hey look...no hands...or legs!"

What do you get when you cross a pig with a cactus? A porkupine!

Yo mama so fat, when she got ran over, the van did a 360 flip to Mars!

When I look at you, I wish I could meet you again for the first time... and walk past.

Why did the judge dismiss court when the orphan walked in?

Even a gay prison wouldn't want him.

What happens to Stephen Hawking when he logs in to his account on Google when it says, "I am not a robot?"

When you wear a big hat and your butt starts to splat diarrhea!

So, when I'm about to take a shower, my mom says, "Take a shower." When I'm about to take out the trash, my mom says, "Take out the trash."

What did the author say when he got a correct answer? "I got it right!"

What's the difference between babies and onions? I cry when I cut onions.

What time should you go to bed when it's bedtime?

What happens when a pun isn’t funny?

It gets PUNished.

When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...

But they know you're blind.

What did the guest say when he arrived at the peanut butter's dinner party?

“Nice spread!”

When you say, "I wish I could cut off these bumps on my neck." (Your mom walking to you with a knife.)

Yo mama so fat that when she saw Thanos and he tried to snap her out of existence, it didn't work, and he said, "Man, I quit!"