When jokes
You know you have twisted humor when you crack a smile when a Minecraft farmer says he separates the white sheep from the colored ones.
Your manna so fat your father will be coming around the mountain when he cums.
When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.
It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.
A man walks into a bar. He sees a family court judge, his wife, her lawyer, and a police officer. He gets on his hands and knees and prays to God out loud. The bartender says, "Why are you praying?" He says, "Because I just saw the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse, and the bible tells me when I see them the end is at hand."
What did the skeleton get when he saw goth girls?......A boner.
When a deaf girl master baits, does she use the other hand to moan?
What gets long when you put it, slides into holes, and likes to squeeze between boobs?
A seatbelt.
I cried when my mom started to cut up onions... onions was a good dog.
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
Your mama so fat, when she walked past the TV, you missed two episodes.
My face when “Free Palestine” wasn’t a sales deal.
Yo mama so fat, when she went up the elevator, the World Trade Center collapsed.
What's the difference between men and pigs? Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.
What happens when you find a bomb at your local bazaar?
It becomes a flee market.
You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."
You're so bald that when you wear a poncho, you look like a broken condom.
What was OceanGate's biggest regret?
Not painting Dylan Mulvaney on the side of the Titan submarine for when it sunk like Bud Light's profits.
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was born the doctor slapped your grandma.
Has anyone else ever been jealous when their laptop dies?
When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?
When he is on the train.