What the worst thing about committing suicide, You can only do it once
What's the only regret you would have when you eventually kill yourself, It wasn't Sooner
last night i burned down an orphanage there was one survivor who said i would regret it i said "what are you gonna do, tell your parents?"
Never attempt to foreshadow your own death you may end up regretting it, you can chop me up and throw me in the fridge if i’m wrong.
Once an orphan got a girlfriend. He regreted it. She left him too.
This year my friends wanted to dress up as crayons for Halloween. They asked me if I wanted to be a tan crayon. I didn’t want to, but I said yes to be nice. I wish I had said no, because now I look like a dick to everyone else.
there was always that one SPECIFIC person u THOUGHT ruined ur life,but it turns out ur life has always been ruined by u being in it..
I'm not saying I hate you. I'm just saying that if I could go back in time I'd give your mom a coat hanger.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
I bought a ceiling fan the other day.
It was a complete waste of money.
He just stands there applauding and saying
"Ooh, I love how smooth it is."
Walk up to the quiet kid and tell him to hang in there, trust me you won’t regret it
All my life I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to achieve something. Now, after messing up my life at every possible chance, I finally realize that what I really want is to have been someone after following through with one thing.
The other day i pushed a Chinese women off the golden gate bridge i was Wong on so many levels.
Guys don’t put the Holocaust books in the fiction section it was the worst mistake of my life!
Marry or don't marry, you will regret both!
Man 1: I-I ran my mom over to get a stupid book. Man 2: aww books aren't that bad. I'm sure she thinks you're a great son considering she can't drive anymore. Man 1: She was in the road and I was rushing to get the last copy of this book. She can't drive or do anything anymore
as i grow older, i remember all the people i lost along the way. maybe tour guide wasn't the right career choice for me...
What was oceangates biggest regret? Not painting Dylan Mulvaney on the side of the titan submarine for when it sunk like bud lights profits.
so this gu named andrew furda was my boy friend for like a half a week so five days then bam i cut my hair he only liked me for my looks and i hoped he regrets it because it is WAR so if u see dis u going down andrew!
What's the difference between a toaster and a ten-year-old Chinese girl? A Japanese soldier would regret sticking his d*ck into a toaster.
you know what is the worst mistake every human being made?
answer: living
