When jokes
When the kid in the wheelchair scares you... you wheelie scared me.
Yo mama so fat when she stepped on a scale, it said... "Error!"
Yo mama so fat when she walked all we knew was EARTHQUAKE!
Yo mama so fat, when she was wearing black by a bank which was getting robbed, they thought, "AHH SWAT!"
Yo mama so fat when she walks the earth talks!
LMAO
Yo mama so fat, when she farts, it's counted as a new gas element.
What does a blind man crying and an unplugged TV have in common?
Nothing can be seen when they get turned on.
Your mom's so fat, when she stands on the scale, it says, "To be continued..."
Your hairline is so far away that Jesus could've seen it when he was on the cross.
What do you get when you cross a lesbian and a platypus? I lick a lot of pussy.
The sexy towers are just like my sexy toes because when I crashed a plane into the tower, it burned and bled.
Q: How do you know when Putin is lying?
A: His lips move.
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.
What happens when the Freedom Towers got hit? They step in Ground Zero.
When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 and 976 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone, and money falls out.
What does a gun and gum have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
When your plane heads for New York...
I got in trouble in school today. The teacher said, "I'm gonna call your parents!"
I said, "Let me know when you find them." <3
Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."
Where did little billy go when he was stuck in a minefield... everywhere.
That joke was pretty dark, but it got pretty light for a second.