When jokes
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."
Yo mama so ugly when she played Five Nights at Freddy's, they thought that she was already in an animatronic costume.
I can't believe what just happened. I was at the bowling alley having a great time with my girlfriend when suddenly a man took all of our bowling pins! I asked him why and he said he needed more tapins to keep his career relevant. I instantly realized it was Penaldo!
What did the spectator miss when going to the toilet?
The entire English innings.
Why was the orphan so successful?
When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.
People are like trees. They fall when you hit them multiple times with an axe.
Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"
Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"
Your momma's so fat, when she pulls her knickers down, her ass is still in them.
When an orphan takes a family photo, it’s called a selfie.
When you are sitting outside at school and this boy comes up to you with a rock in his hand and says, "Do you know where Mrs. Stewart is at?"
Yo mama so ugly, when she go to church they say it's a demon!
We thought that my mother died in the best way possible, during her sleep.
But when we did an autopsy on her, we saw she actually died in the worst way possible. During the autopsy.
When you tell your mom that she is bad at jokes, then she tells you, "Well, I made you!"
I think about my life, and then I think about death. I prefer death. If you ask me, life is just a time when you die. Basically, death is life, meaningless 0-0.
Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she looked at the mirror, I cracked up.
When your grades get mailed to your house when you expect to get them in school.
When you get home, your mom is there with the belt, going 1k miles per hour.
What happened when the corn got scolded? He got an earful!
What do you call it when you sell Panera Bread in your shed?
Panera Shed.
Why is the orphan happy when he wakes up from a coma?
Because there is a family reunion.