Whats jokes

What did Gandalf say to Mario? "You shall not pass!"

What did the math teacher write on his party invitations?

Be there or B2.

My boy, I think it is about time that I leave this world. Now draw your weapon and kill me now!

*draws a picture of his "epic" sword*

"What... WHAT... WTH ARE YOU DOING SIMPLETON? I DIDN'T MEAN THAT KIND OF DRAW!"

What instrument can a skeleton never play?

An organ.

What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling.

What is the real reason why men jack off? They just enjoy killing kids.

If having sex for money makes you a wh*re, then what does having sex for free make you?

Non-profit wh*reganisation.

What movie do orphans relate to the most?

Spider-Man: No Way Home

What’s the difference between orphans and blind children?

None. Neither can see their parents.

What do you call 4 black guys and 2 white guys?

The Oreo Gang!

I asked the gym trainer what type of machine I should use to get the best looking women.

He said the ATM outside.

Why are women so bad at parking?

Because they've been lied to about what 8 inches look like their whole lives.

What does Michael Jackson and caviar have so much in common?

They both come on little white crackers.

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.

When I’m bored, I text a random number, “I hid the body... now what?”

What's the difference between your birth and 9/11?

One was planned.

Guess what? I have a baby in ten trashcans.

What do sex and food have in common?

Grandma makes both better.

What's the fastest way to get to the hospital? Stand in the middle of the road.

what do you call an emo person who's not depressed?

dead.