Weather jokes
What do you call a skeleton in the snow? A numb skull.
Why is the sun red today?
The sun turned red today. Here's why. As an enormous Atlantic storm batters Ireland, a related phenomenon is turning heads further east over in the United Kingdom. ... Just like the way sunsets are sometimes red, excess particles in the atmosphere can change the color of the sun in the daytime.
My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets!"
What do you call an old snowman?
Answer: Water.
Rainbows top the class, as they always score with flying colors.
Why do we name hurricanes?
To keep an eye on them.
Yo momma so stupid... weather man says it's chilly outside... instead of a jacket, she gets a bowl and spoon!
Why don’t rappers ever get cold?
Because they have so many fans!
What did the north tower say to the south tower during the summer? Get ready for fall!
Brrr, it's fucking cold outside, aye? What do you guys want for Christmas? A sweet video game? Maybe a cool action figure? Oh, how about the latest phone!
Who me? Oh, I guess... I wish snow could melt as fast as the snowflakes that downvote good jokes! Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals!
Texas be like, "We vote to freeze ourselves!"
Yesterday we lost a quarter of our roof in the storm, oof.
What kind of shorts do clouds wear?
Thunderwear.
Two kids are out in the cold, with downpours of snow erupting from the clouds.
One of the kids says something: "Can we build a snowman that is going through puberty?"
The other kid says something else: "Yes. It sounds cool."
After a while, the snowman was finished, and some words jut out of the first kid's mouth: "Wow! Look at that snowman! It's got hair all over, but I think it's missing something though."
The other kid jumps a little and begins speaking: "Oh, I know what it is!"
After a while, a body part made of a carrot and two cucumbers appears on the snowman's crotch. It is a penis and a ballsack.
The first kid speaks: "Icy what you did there."
The other kid replies: "Good thing I didn't slip up there."
The first kid replies: "Well, that's snow problem."
The other kid then uttered this: "These puns would make the most frigid individual crack up."
The first kid then says: "I know, right?"
They then begin a snowball fight.
The other kid then says: "Only the men have snowballs!"
Someone said to me when it was winter it[’]s time for you to “chill out.” I was like 👁👄👁
What is the difference between snow boots on Earth Day, today, after dinner, and walking home?
Why do emos love the winter? Because of the long sleeves.
Fall coming 🍁 grab you a hoodie & sum1's thick thigh baby mama to keep you warm 😌🍂
Why was the stadium so hot?
Because all the fans left!
How did the skeleton know it was gonna rain?
If you said he felt it in his bones, you're wrong. He watched the weather forecast.