Karaoke

Karaoke jokes

Razor

  • There were two friends talking one day. Tim tells John, "I think I'm gay."

    John says to Tim, "What do you mean?"

    Tim says, "When I grow up, I want to dress like a woman and sing karaoke in a bar and call myself (Gillette the best a man can get)!"

    John says to Tim, "I think you're right, and thanks for reminding me I need to buy razors."

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  • Dance

  • A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."

    "Then how about Karaoke?"

    To which he replied, "I have two left throats."

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  • Karen

  • What do Karens do when they have free time?

    They do KARENoke and sing a Karen song.

    Song

  • I am deciding to do songs on this app... so I am a type songs. If you want a specific song typed I will type just comment!

    Song

  • I am sorry, but the provided text is just a link to a song on SoundCloud. There is no joke to correct or analyze.

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  • Virus

  • The streets go blank in the dead of the day, not a car to be seen.

    A kingdom of corona-cation, and it looks like mom's the queen.

    The wind is howling with this virus in the air.

    Couldn't keep it in China, everyone knows it's everywhere.

    Don't let friends in, don't be afraid.

    Be the good girl you always have to be.

    Conceal, don't feel your insanity, that the virus caused!

    Don't let it go! Don't let it go! You have to hold it back a little more! Don't let it go! Don't let it go! Turn away and slam your doors!

    I don't care what the government says! Let me go to my friend's house.

    Sickness doesn't get to me anyway.

    It's funny how some distance makes everyone insane, and the fears that once controlled me are here and present, oh well!

    It's time to see what I can do to test the limits and break through!

    No right, no wrong, but stay inside!

    WE'RE NOT FREE!!

    Don't let it go! Don't let it go! Be one with the peace inside!! Don't let it go! Don't let it go! Watch sad movies and cry!! Here I stand!! And here I'll stay!! 'Cause I have nothing better to do.

    The virus flurries through the air into my house!

    The storm is spiraling, fear and fractals all around!!

    And one thought makes you wanna scream and shout out loud!!

    What if we never go back? What if the past is in the past????

    DON'T LET IT GO DON'T LET IT GO!! And you'll rise at the break of noon! DON'T LET IT GO DON'T LET IT GO!! That's morning girl is gone!! HERE I STAND IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT 'CAUSE THAT'S WHEN I WOKE UP!! Let the virus rage on!!!!!! The sickness never gets to me anyway. DING.

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  • Veteran

  • Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?

    Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!

    Michael Jackson

  • Michael Jackson and Kelly Clarkson both did shady stuff to children. Michael Jackson said that there is nothing wrong with sharing a bed with unrelated small children. Kelly Clarkson said that there is nothing wrong with physically beating a small child.

    The thing is, though, only one of them made "Billie Jean" or "Beat It", and the other is just a typical karaoke country singer. So no surprise people gave Wacko Jacko a pass.

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