Weapon jokes
What weapon does a fat Jedi use?
A heavy saber.
Why did the boy shoot the clock? He wanted to kill time.
Why did the boy shoot the clock?
What did a gay Indian use as weapons of war?
A rain-bow.
What should you use to battle a T-Rex?
A dino-sword.
Why do I carry pepper spray?
Just in case of as-SAULT.
What weighs 5 oz. and is very dangerous?
A sparrow with a machine gun, of course!
There were three Indians that got kicked out of the tribe.
One said, "Me find food," and he came back with a decent size rabbit. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see rabbit, me shoot rabbit, and rabbit fall down dead."
The 2nd Indian, "Me find food." He came back with a good sized deer. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see deer, me shoot deer, deer fall down dead."
The third Indian said, "Me find food." He came back crawling, missing a leg and an arm, and he was all cut up. The others asked what happened. He said, "Me see train, me shoot train, train no stop!"
What's even funnier than throwing a baby off a building?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
I know a woman who owns a taser. -- She's stunning!
Today someone was killed with a starter pistol. Police think it might be race related.
I started a company selling land mines that look like prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.
What is Jesus' favorite gun?
A nail gun.
How did the octopus go to the war?
Well armed.