Watch jokes
Why does the Please Touch Museum sound like "police touch museum?"
Because they gotta watch out for the pedos.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
He wanted to make TIMELESS TRACKS.
Orphans around my area only watched Youtube Shorts.
I asked them and then realized they can't click the home button.
Ur mama so fat she needs two watches because she's in different time zones.
What's an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy ;)
It’s not like they can watch it anyway: it’s PG.
"Hold my beer, watch this."
What do orphans like to watch? Spider-Man: Homecoming.
Have you watched the show "Naked and Afraid"? Well, I play it every Saturday with my uncle.
Why did the orphan cry? Because he was an orphan and he watched his parents die.
Should cishet people REALLY be watching Ranboo?
My friend is upset with me because I sniffed his grandmother's nickers. Not sure if it was because she was still wearing them or if it was because the whole family was watching. Either way, the rest of her funeral was really awkward.
If wishes were horses, Beggars would ride.
If turnips were watches, I would wear one by my side.
And if if's and an's were pots and pans, The tinker would never work!
When you're watching "Gnomeo and Juliet 2" and your dad walks in on the gnome shaking his butt.
Me: *watching TV*
Mom: Omg, no way, your dad is coming!
Me: Really?
Mom: Obviously not, he never loved or wanted you.
A new feature that we are bringing to the Olympics is 3D viewing. So if you're watching the javelin, I would look away now.
"Abracadabra! Alacuzam! See that woman? She’s now a man."
"After the man got some sun, I turned this banana into a gun! Now look! I now have your phone, Apple Watch, and your credit card!"
"Bonus, we can even watch a movie and still chat! Love you!
Which one do you want to watch? 😀"
What's the funniest thing about being ringside at a UFC fight?
When you look around and all of the spectators are wearing white gowns and fuzzy socks, and you realize you aren't at a UFC event, you're watching your fellow patients fight to the death at a psychiatric facility.
I could have sworn while watching anime I saw an American Boeing B-29 Superfortress in the background dropping bombs!
I’m enyaw and I fancy my PE teacher. She is called Kelly Pearce and I go to Beckfoot Oakbank. I always watch her because I am a creep. I live at school under the stairs, but I also try [to] follow her home, and if I'm unsuccessful I look her up on a dodgy website and go on Google maps and look at her door.