What does a priest and a wristwatch have in common? They both start at 12.
Timepiece Jokes
Why is it a bad idea to eat a clock? Because it's so time-consuming.
When you have a hand clock it goes tic-tac.
When an American has it go backwards, it's tactic.
My lesbian neighbors gave me a Rolex. Guess they misunderstood when I said I wanted to watch.
I ate a watch once... it was time-consuming.
Wanna hear a joke about measurement... never mind, it would take too long.