Watch jokes
Yeah man, you watch Pornhub, and you have premium too, but at least I don't need Premium to see your mom in bed.
Why is it so difficult to watch hentai?
They moan louder than your speakers.
Jesus was being hung up on the cross, and me and all the other people at the bottom of the hill were watching. Jesus cries out,
"Peter, Peter come to me!"
So I climb up the hill on my hands and knees, and when I reach the top, the Romans cut off my arms and chuck me back down the hill.
"Peter, Peter come to me!" cries Jesus once more. I stumble up the hill, then the Romans cut my legs off and threw me back down. For the third time, Jesus cries,
"Peter, Peter come to me!". So I wriggle up the hill, and I guess the Romans pitied me and let me through.
"Look Peter, I can see my house from here!"
You say Alex Jones, I say Alex moans mmmmm. I like that fat, tasty big boy and his Rolex watches, mummy, he turns me on!
If I smiled one centimeter each time I watched someone I hated die, I'd look like the Cheshire Cat.
Tell world's best yo mama joke to an orphan, then watch them cry.
9/11 was pretty great to me, it's just hilarious to watch people lose at Jenga.
Never let an orphan watch Fast and the Furious.
All they will talk about is how great their family is.
What sort of movies do cows like to watch?
Moosicals!
Why do orphans watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas"?
Answer: Oogie Boogie is ugly, so they want to be ugly.
When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...
But they know you're blind.
What is the worst movie to watch at an orphanage? Batman.
Why don't orphans watch TV?
Because of "Family Guy."
"Hold my beer, watch this."
If an orphan wants food, who does it? No one. Everybody just watches him starve because they couldn't find his parents.
I feel sad for orphans. They can't watch Star Wars because it's parental guidance.
Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."
Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."
Why can't an orphan watch the movie:
It was family rated.
I was watching Avengers and I thought I saw a grape, but it was just Thanos.
I was excited to watch Fast and Furious because of Dom Toretto, then I realized family is nothing to me 'cause I'm an orphan.