Want jokes

"I wish I was either Christmas lights or a mistletoe."

"Why?"

"Because I want to hang!"

What did the poo say when it fell out of your bum?

"Your anus looks like my mum's bedsheet which is smelly and covered in poo."

I also just wanted to add that a Goonie's anus looks like my nan's mouth.

The Ruler of Varvona wanted a fruitcake, but his subjects showed up at his castle with a Christian instead.

And he said: "NO, NO, NO! YOU IMBECILES! NOT THAT KIND OF FRUITCAKE!"

Jack and Jill wanted some pills.

So they went to the dealer; he saw they were kids and said, "Fuck this shit," then Jack rocked his ass and took all the good shit except birth control pills.

I want a relationship.

*Masturbates*

I don't want a relationship.

Women should have the right to choose whether they want to do cooking or cleaning first.

"Me tells dad joke often."

"I want to hear it."

"Me? You wouldn't get it."

Why did the girl bring the ladder to school? Because she wanted to go to high school.

Like this post and comment down below if you want me to announce my real name in my next post!

GIVEAWAAAAAAY!!!

Okay, 19 dollar Fortnite card. Who wants it? And yes, I’m giving it away. Remember: Share, share, share! And trolls: Don’t get BLOCKED!

5 4 3 2 1. I love the huge bright sun. 5 4 3 2 1. My life has just begun. Though Akeld and Unkown, make me feel alone, they want be dead, and off with my head, and all I said was... NO FRICKIN' HATIN' IN THESE COMMENTS! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

It's quite ironic that people tell you "Happy Birthday," then they want to give you a spanking.

I done a thing where we have chat hangouts with people that like Gwen or just want to hang out, do stuff.

All people are invited!

We have a lot! Enjoy!

Hello Watersharky, I am Koge.

I see your songs and want to be your agent. Please write back about this offer. Thank you.

Where do mermaids get a job?

At the kelp wanted station.

Al Fayed’s son arrives at heaven’s gates and sees his driver.

He shouts “you stupid cunt!”

The driver says, “Watch, Boss?”

Dodi replies...:

“I said I WANT TO FUCK DI IN THE TUNNEL NOT FUCKING DIE IN THE TUNNEL!”

Why did the orphan become a criminal?

Because he wanted to actually be wanted.

Why do orphans play GTA 5?

To get wanted!

Why do depressed people want to kill themselves?

To be loved on the news show for 10 minutes.

Hey, you person who's scrolling, please leave your HONEST opinion on life. Do you think "life sucks" or "eh, it's okay," etc.? It can be short; if you don't want to, then that's okay.