Violence jokes
What's worse than 5 babies tied to 5 trees?
1 baby tied to 5 trees.
What is worse: 10 babies stapled to 1 tree, or 1 baby stapled to ten trees?
What's Adam's biggest fear?
Andy with a belt.
OMG guys, I finally did it. I made a head slicey boy. I have headless.
So the other day my black friend and I were working on a group project. He was so slow so I whipped him to make him faster.
Do you know the best thing about killing a hooker?
Not only do you get your money back, but the second hour is free.
It's not rape if you say "April Fools!"
How do you make a baby cry?
You punch it in the face.
What do you get when you cross a bunny and a Rottweiler? Just the Rottweiler.
You're the bunny, and I'm the Rottweiler.
Rape jokes aren’t funny. People like me that are actually victims of rape are triggered by them.
My dad came over late at night. He was drunk. He started telling me how useless I was. Then I went to the kitchen, grabbed a knife, and stabbed him in the chest 47 times.
Three minutes later, he died. Now I’m losing my mind and cutting myself.
If I was in a room with Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, Hitler, and my greatest enemy, I would pour out the bullets and beat my enemy with the gun.
Hate me all you want, but I rather love bullying in all fairness. I love to watch all the loner kids being abused while simultaneously making a prediction for when which one of them will finally snap and shoot up the school.
Someone kills an emotionally weak person by hard words and bullying.
No one will suspect the killer was anyone who took part.
"Rape is funny until it's your little sister or daughter getting raped."
"Muffin Man, Muffin Man, he's gonna rape you in his van."
Jack and Jill went up a hill so Jill could lick Jack's candystick, but Jill got a surprise when she saw her boyfriend Rik. He got so angry Jack has no candystick no more. Jill went home with a black eye, and Rik got arrested for cutting Jack's candystick.
Why did the rape victim cross the road?
Because she was a chicken!
Can people please shut up about "male privileges"? There is no right that men have that women don't.
Women have the right to genital integrity. Women can vote without having to sign up for the draft.
Women have the right to choose parenthood; men do not.
Women have the right to be assumed caregivers for children.
Women have the right to call unwanted, coerced sex rape.
Women have the right to lower jail sentences for the same crime.
Women have the right to not be assumed sexual predators.
Women have the right to government departments that solely serve their interests. They also have the luxury of "women only" events that men cannot even dream of. (They even took the boy scouts away from us.)
Women have the right to government-enforced gender quotas.
Women have the right to exclusive tax benefits for being a business owner.
Women have the right to domestic violence shelters.
Women have the right to not be assumed the primary aggressor in a domestic dispute.
Women have the right to rape a man or boy, and if she gets pregnant from that man/boy, they can sue him for child support.
So it is women who have more rights.
So shut up, feminists, please.
Rape is not a joke.