Violence jokes
How do you fit a hundred babies into a small bucket?
With a blender.
What's the difference between an onion and a dead baby?
The baby doesn't cry when you chop it.
*School Shooter Walks In*
That one kid who plays "Pumped Up Kicks" at max volume.
Mom, where are we going?
To your grandma's funeral.
Yeah, 'cause I 360 no-scoped that b*tch in the face.
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing?
Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
Memes
What do you call a terrorist at a cinema?
A box office bomb.
How do you make a cat say woof? You cover it in petrol and light a match.
I pushed a disabled kid into a fire and called him "hot wheels."
So recently I hit an orphan with a 2x4, and he started crying. What's he gonna do? Tell his family? XD
Imagine a white van. Now imagine a white guy in the driver seat with a sombrero on and his arm out the window, and on the side of the van it says "Free Candy." But there's blood all over the van and a dead clown in the back.
Bruh, the cops just arrested a black dude...
Well nvm, they shot him dead.
Chuck Norris strangled someone with a cordless phone.
Q. What's red and pink and spins around really fast? A. A baby in a blender.
Why are clips 30 rounds? Because that's the average class size.
What do you call a 5th grader with no friends?
Sandy Hook survivor.
Why are black men's eyes always red after sex?
From the mace.
How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
Give them a Sandy Hook.
What is a terrorist's first move in chess?
C4.
What’s the difference between a gun and liberals?
Guns only have one trigger.
What did the man say in the morning after beating up his wife?
"I woke up Chris Breezy."