Violence jokes
How do you fit 100 rape victims inside a Mini Cooper?
In the ashtray.
Are you a school? Because I want to shoot a bunch of kids in you.
My sister told me words don't hurt her, so I chucked a dictionary at her.
What first went through Sally’s head when the Nazis came?
A bullet.
What's the difference between a school shooting pistol and a baked potato? The physical composition, of course, but they both pack the same heat.
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
Why did a school shooter get banned from a game server?
He was caught aimbotting.
I don't understand why, when I went to the shooting range today, the police came. Like, bro, I always go to elementary schools.
What do you get when you cross a road with a stalker?
Raped.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the car.
Sonic says... April 1st is the best day to do a school shooting. They will think it’s a joke! 😃
Are you a school? Because I want to shoot kids inside you.
How do you make a little girl cry for a second time?
By wiping her blood off your dick with her teddy bear.
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.
Any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery.
I kicked a soccer ball at the kid in the wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.
O-Block
What do Call of Duty players say when they shoot up a school?
654-721-8940
(If you understand the joke, you're a god.)
There once was a boy named Sammy who loved this girl beyond belief. Her name was Rayne, but she didn’t notice him and or talk to him, but one day she did and they ended up liking each other and getting married and living happily... wait, no, that’s not right.
Sammy actually snuck into Rayne’s house one day and kidnapped her and locked her in his basement and made her into a puppet so he could keep her forever and ever. The End.
When you are sitting outside at school and this boy comes up to you with a rock in his hand and says, "Do you know where Mrs. Stewart is at?"