Violence jokes
What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?
Gang rape.
How do you turn a baby into a dog?
Douse it in gasoline, light a match, *WOOF*!
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I have a gun,
GET IN THE VAN!!
So there was a school shooting in Florida. Why didn't the shooter just go to Disney?.......sorry, I just work there and I'm trying to get people to come on down.
He asked for a shot of beer?
He got shot and killed.
How to make a baby make funny faces?
Put it feet first in a blender.
What is worse: 10 babies stapled to 1 tree, or 1 baby stapled to ten trees?
What do you do when life gives you lemons? Slit your wrist and give a lemon a twist. 🙂💊💉
What's the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest?
At least one does something when it is triggered.
What's the difference between a shooter and a bullied autistic kid? It depends on who's shooting.
What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.
Where did Lucy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
How long does it take for 5 babies to die in the microwave?
I don't know, I can't count while I masturbate...
Why did the clown stop smiling?
Someone chopped his lips off.
If I called you gay, you would probably hit me with your purse.
What's the only time you can do almost whatever you want?
When you have a gun in your hand.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.
What first went through Sally's head when the Nazis came? A bullet.
Where did Sally go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.
What did Sally get for Christmas? A bike.
Kill yourself, hoes!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
My favorite sex position is the JFK. I splatter all over her while she screams and tries to get out of the car.