Vehicle jokes
What's a kidnapper's favorite White Vans?
Man: How tall is a penguin?
Bartender: About three foot, why?
Man: Oh shit, the Bible-bashing nuns! I fucking hit one!
Poor car.
What's the difference between dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.
What has 10 wheels and flies? A garbage truck.
I was anonymous with the previous jokes. I will now go by "I can fly! *falls*."
What's black and white and red all over? A mime I hit with my car.
What's the difference between a pile of 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?
A Mustang Challenger doesn't exist.
There is this boy in my year; he is in a wheelchair, so I kicked a football at him and pushed him, and then I shouted, "Rocket League!"
Why can't fat kids change a tire?
They would eat the donut.
Your hairline be going up and down like a Formula 1 car!
There's a Mexican, Brazilian, and Cuban in a S60. Who's driving?
"Hey, today was great!"
"What happened?"
"I ran into my ex today."
"What's so great about that?"
"I was in my car!"
Are you a school bus? Because I want to fill you with kids.
What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly a clown into the tiny car.
Bro, you ever think while driving the moped why they call it a footrest when the foot never lets it rest? The foot is working harder than the engine. You push, push, but still go the same speed like a turtle with a bad mood during a rabbit race...
Yo mama's so fat, I swerved to miss her in my car and ran out of gas.
What do you call a wheelchair on fire?
Hot Wheels.
I told this man to rev his vehicle.
Didn't know wheelchairs can't rev.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
Q: Why did the baby cross the road?
A: It wasn't in its car seat.
What's a car's favorite place to hang out?
A CARnival!