Carnival jokes

Did you know that the Royal family like carnivals?

Princess Diana was really fond of bumper cars.

Why was the emo kicked out of the Carnival? Because he was cutting in line.

A girl with no arms and one leg goes to her mother and asks: "Mom, next year for the carnival, can I dress up as a princess?"

The mother replies: "Why? Didn't you like the ice lolly dress from last year?"

What's a car's favorite place to hang out?

A CARnival!

My family loves to have dance parties. My dad will just play music from his iPod, and I'll go to the light switch and make a nice strobe light effect. Everyone loves it, especially my younger cousin. He gets down on the floor and starts breakdancing! It makes him so happy, and he needs that extra joy in his life, especially since the doctor recently diagnosed him with epilepsy.

I kicked a soccer ball at the kid in the wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.

Nazis have marched in Melbourne. Are you sure Eric Clapton and Carrie Underwood are not touring in Australia?

I was in the corner shop and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!

That time when you realize that Osama bin Laden and Carrie Underwood share the same birthday...