Ups jokes

What do you call the sky? Up high, high! AHAHAHAHAHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAA

Your dad left you because he went for milk.

*1,000,000 years later*

Her: Dad come back!

Him: FBI open up!

One time you walked up to a mirror, but it’s shattered because of your reflection.

Never give up, 'cause never gonna give you up.

Never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you, never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna desert you.

Shup up, transparent hairline. Look like you got splashed by some clear soap.

Why did the orphan get arrested for identity theft?

He dressed up as Batman for Halloween.

A man came up to me and threatened me with his milk, cheese, and butter... how dairy!

I asked my phone why I couldn't get a date.

It showed a picture of myself.

Hairline look like it got slapped up by Will Smith.

Me and my wife decided we would only smoke after sex.

I'm still on the first pack. She's up to 2 packs a week.

Did you hear about the bad joke? No? It hasn't been made up yet. HAHAHAHAHAHA

Farmer's Wife: Honey, where are the cows?

Farmer: Up in the mountains grazing.

Farmer's Wife: Why?

Farmer: I don't know, but the steaks have never been higher.

I had sex, but ended up going "uuyaahh!"

Two gays came into the bar and said, "What's up, you big faf mother of hell?"

And just look up anything that is hot! And don't forget to comment!

What do you call Cyanne when she first wakes up? Nanny McPhee.

People who are bothering Gwen, stop. This is a joke site, and you guys should know that!

People, she is not even 40 or whatever. I see the comments, and they are so stupid. Do you even know her in life? No!!! Shut up and leave her alone!

Me: What's that sound?

Ex: What?

Me: Oh, it's the elevator going up. BYEEEE see you on another level!

Gwen, are you dead????? If not, I am Alya. Thanks for always standing up for me!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey Alya and JK Master, how are you guys doing? No one being an ass to you guys today, right? If so, I'll beat them up :)