Two jokes
What kinda pizza did the Twin Towers order?
Two plains.
If you play FNF, I play a game because he has two balls, boi.
If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?
Why can't America play chess?
There are missing two towers.
Q: What do you call a blonde with only two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
Two friends are arguing and one friend says, "Jason Warhis is not afraid of water and not ifs, ands, or buts about it."
And the other friend says, "Butt he is."
If I throw a paper airplane at two twins, did I cause 9/11?
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
What do you call two Latinos playing baseball one on one?
A man went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "What happened to you?"
The man replied and said, "I broke my arm in two places!"
Then the doctor replied with, "DON’T GO BACK TO THOSE TWO PLACES!!"
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Your mum's so fat, she broke Britain too!
I feel bad for all American Clash Royale players.
They always start with two towers downed.
Two whores are watching the sun come up, splitting a bottle of Mad Dog and celebrating another night of servicing the general public. One asks the other: "Say. You ever been picked up by the fuzz?"
Her friend thinks it over, "No...but I have been swung around by the tits a few times!"
Three men are on a bench in Soviet Russia talking shit about Stalin. One of the men all of a sudden pulls out a KGB badge and says, "You two are coming with me for treason." One of the other men also pulls out a badge and says, "Not me." The third man pulls out a badge and says, "Wow? There's a lot of agents here."
9/11 is like genders.
There used to be two of them, and now it’s a touchy subject.
The highest level of trust in the world is when two cannibals are each giving each other blowjobs.
What do you call two natives in a sleeping bag?
Twix.
One day in Roblox, someone was arguing with me, and they asked me my age. "18." They said that they were twenty-two.
Me: "If you're so smart, what's the largest daycare game on Roblox?"
Him: "Yo Hair," he said. Then he left the game, and I said, "That is so messed up. Actually, that's bullcrap."
I went home to my girlfriend with milk! She said, "Oh thank you honey!"
Then I got a call from a girl named Melissa. She called and said, "Steven, where the hell have you been? It's been two weeks and you still haven't come back yet?"
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.