What's the difference between cars and grass?
They both have wheels, except for the grass.
What do you call a magic car?
A human.
Pinto?
A robber robbed a bank and ran into the road and got hit by a car.
The cops said to him, "That's CARma for you!"
What do you call a banana driving a car?
A banana car.
How to get 60 Translink workers? Please head out of the pool because ya'll are fat. Oh wait, didn't you poop yourself? Say sorry to your underwear while pooping as a fat Canadian Translink worker, little boy.
Your mum is so fat, I had to take 2 buses and a train to get to her good side.
My son always said he wanted to skydive, so we went on a plane, and mid-flight, we had to jump out. The only issue is we were on a commercial flight to Arizona.
What is a plane ✈️ that can not fly?
A fake one ☝️
My favorite joke was: what's the difference between a teacher and a train?
When is a car not a car?
When it's a house.
Why can't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got stuck in a crack!
What do you call a magic car that I can do to help me out for you and I will be doing a great day?
Why did my mother buy me a Honda? She knows I can't move, so she pushed my wheelchair with me in it into the ocean. I survived just by a second, but a shark got my wheelchair, fucking bitch.
Little Jonny, what you like airplane? How? Because you fly fast and jump high.
What is one of the worst but funniest incidents ever: a bullet in a baby in a baggy in a barrel in a bus in a nuclear plant were all of the employee's are molesters?
What is a magic car? One that flies!
One day, the Pope is coming to America in his limo, and he said to the driver, "Why don’t you let me drive for once?"
The driver thinks to himself, "Well, I can’t say no to this guy; he’s the Pope." So the driver pulls over, and they change places. The Pope was having fun, hauling butt down the freeway, dogging cars. After a while, the driver taps on the window and tells the Pope, "Slow down a bit; you might get pulled over."
The Pope says, "Ahhh, don’t worry about it; I’m the Pope." So he rolls up the window and continues to drive very fast. After a few moments, he gets pulled over. The cop walks to the car, and the Pope rolls down the tinted window. The cop sees the Pope and says, "Oh, I, ehhh, sorry, can you hold on a minute?"
The Pope says, "Sure." The cop walks back to his car and radios back to the station. He says, "Guys, I just pulled over someone really important."
They ask who, "The President?"
"No, more important."
"The president of another country?"
"No, more important."
"An ambassador?"
"No, even more important."
"Well, who is it?"
"I don’t know, but the Pope is the chauffeur."
Why did the van cross the road?
To get to the school for the little kids.
What part of the train goes "toot toot"?
The caboose.
