Transportation jokes
Why did the black guy cross the street to check King Van?
What did the traffic light 🚦 say? Oh.
Why was the rapper always late?
Because he had to drop his kids off at the Rhyme Bus.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen! Ugh!”
The woman goes to the rear of the bus and angrily sits down. She says to a man next to her “The driver just insulted me!”
The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”
A rich girl is flying on his helicopter when suddenly it crashes, killing everyone. What was the last thing that went through her head?
The helicopter blade!
Why did the chicken cro-
UM, ACTUALLY, THE CHICKEN CAN'T CROSS THE ROAD UNLESS IT'S UNDER SOME ROOSTER OR HEN SUPERVISION OR ELSE THE CAR WILL CRASH THE CHICKEN, AND THEY WILL DIE. 🤓
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
What did one plane say to the other?
"It’s been a long day, I’m ready to crash."
Other plane: "No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!"
Why did the plane cross the road? To get to the other tower.
What do you call a nun on a bike?
Virgin Mobile.
What do you do when you see a spaceman?
Park in it, man!
If you turn the word "racecar" backwards, it says "racecar".
But if you turn the racecar sideways, you have Paul Walker's blood on your hands.
You know why they call her Wonder Woman?
She's always wondering where she parked her invisible jet.
How do bees get to school?
They take the buzz.
Q: What do you call a chip that goes fast?
A: A rocket chip.
Today was a bad day. First, my ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver.
"Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!
Are you a school bus? Because I want to fill you with kids.
Do your buses run on time?
No, they run on diesel.
Someone complimented my parking today! They left a sweet note on my windshield that said, “Parking fine.”