Transportation jokes
Yo mama is so fat she can't even get in her own car because she's fat.
Why did I have to pay $300 on Uber?
I had to get from your forehead to your big ass nose.
A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.
How do bees 🐝 get to school?
They ride the school buzz!
What begins in F and ends in UCK?
Fire truck.
If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.
Kill yourself in any way. I'm killing myself the HIGHway.
I asked my midget neighbor if he wanted a lift. He told me to "Fuck off!!!" I thought, what a cheeky cunt and zipped my backpack up and walked away.
Today sucked. My girlfriend got hit by a car, and I lost my job as an Uber driver.
Yo mama so fat, when she takes an elevator, it ALWAYS goes down!
Mosely in a white van.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he got hit by a car.
What did the train made of glue make?
GLUE GLUUUUUUUUUUUE!
Were you born on a highway? Because most accidents happen on the highway.
I lost my job by giving up my seat to someone.
I didn't know you're not supposed to do that if you're a bus driver!
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other site? Ah hah hah hah hah!
I was on a plane and my mom said, "It's just a little turbulence."
And I said, "Mom, we just got on the runway!"
A cowboy rides into a ranch on Sunday, stays three days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible?
Why do deer stay in front of a moving car?
To commit suicide.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!