Transportation jokes
What do you call a blind person driving a car?
Died.
What has two wheels and goes really fast?
A vegetable down a hill.
I wish we could implant all parts because I could have used some car parts from Stephen Hawking after he died.
I thought opening a door for a lady was good manners, but she just screamed and flew out of the plane.
The convoy truckers are a joke.
Memes
What's big and yellow...?
A bus full of kids.
What do you call a fast boat?
Usain Boat.
Were you born on the highway? That is where most accidents happen.
Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."
Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."
Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."
Teacher: "*stands up*"
Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."
Your mama is so fat, by the time I swerved to miss her with the car, I ran out of gas.
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
Yo mama so fat that when she gets in the truck, it breaks.
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To get to the studio on the other side.
What's a rapper's favorite type of car?
A RAPMOBILE!
Why did the rapper take the bus to the studio?
Because their car ran out of RHYME.
Your mama is so fat that when she went to run in a yellow jumpsuit, the kids thought they missed the school bus.
One day, I was just chillin', being a tower. I saw a plane, but it was slowly growing.
Then it hit me.
Why did the Twin Towers go to Uber Eats?
Because they wanted something plain.
What do you call a rapper who's also a PILOT?
Fly Guy
How do you disappoint people in Africa?
Send a message saying that you’re going to send trucks full of food, water, and clothing.
But don’t follow through and send the trucks empty.