Transportation jokes
When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?
When he is on the train.
I pushed a disabled kid down a busy road and yelled out, "Mario Kart!"
Q: What do you call a chip that goes fast?
A: A rocket chip.
How many people can you fit in a car?
6 - 3 in the back, 2 in the front, and my nan in the ashtray.
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?
Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.
How do bees get to school? On a school buzz.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream?
Because she got hit by a bus.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
What's the difference between a road bump and children crossing the road?
A road bump will make you slow down when you drive over it.
Man: Doctor, where are you taking me?
Doctor: To the morgue.
Man: But I’m not dead yet.
Doctor: Are we there yet?
What is long and hard and is full of seamen?
A submarine.
What was OceanGate's biggest regret?
Not painting Dylan Mulvaney on the side of the Titan submarine for when it sunk like Bud Light's profits.
What did the bus say to the other bus?
"Beep!"
What did the Ford Mustang say to the crowd of innocent people?
I'D HIT THAT!
What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?
Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to the other side.
How do you get a million Pikachus in a bus?
You shove them on!
Why did Zozo the hobo cross the road?
To eat the Pringles.
What’s the difference between a dirty bus terminal and a lobster with implants?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
Q: Why did Sally drop her ice cream?
A: She got hit by a bus.
What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
A Yamahahahaha!