Transportation jokes
What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Get in the car.
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."
The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."
Why did the dead baby cross the road?
It was strapped to the chicken.
A man went to a Ford dealership hoping to find a car, but he said they weren't affordable.
Where do boats go when they get sick? The dock.
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.
A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.
What do you call a plane with no wings?
Sally.
What did the helicopter say?
Helicopter: "Kobe!"
How do you spell racecar backwards?
racecar
How do you spell racecar sideways?
Paul Walker's death.
How many people can you fit in a car?
6 - 3 in the back, 2 in the front, and my nan in the ashtray.
Are you a plane? Because I wanna be in control of you for a few hours.
I pushed a disabled kid down a busy road and yelled out, "Mario Kart!"
Give a man a plane ticket, and he’ll fly for a day.
Push a man from a plane, and he’ll fly for the rest of his life.
What’s yellow and can sink a bus full of kids?
What takes up 10 parking spaces? Five female drivers.
What do you get when you mix a 737 and 767?
A 797.
Q: What do you call a chip that goes fast?
A: A rocket chip.
What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?
Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"
What did the Ford Mustang say to the crowd of innocent people?
I'D HIT THAT!
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to the other side.