Worst Jokes Ever
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? A roamin' Catholic.
Why do dwarfs do drugs?
To get high.
Na, don't be mean to fat people. Oh wait, never mind, they can handle the weight.
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
What is better to have, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
My sister said to roast her, but my mom said I'm not allowed to burn trash.
"Stupidity isn’t a crime, so you’re free to go."
What do you call it when school starts in Africa?
Black to school.
On Halloween you better hide your candy, or else there will be a fella named Big Dick Randy.
What do you call a deaf and blind axe murderer?
Helen Killer.
Me yelling every gay slur to get suspended.
I’m in catholic school.
I went to the pharmacy the other day. I tried to buy a pack of condoms, but I pretended I didn't have enough money to mess with the cashier.
I went back into the aisles of the store, got a pack of rubber bands and plastic wrap, bought them, and walked out. I loved the look on the cashier's face when they saw my decision.
Scientists say a banana a day is great for the colon.
But you gotta eat it!
What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?
They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.
Why are Christmas trees banned in mental hospitals?
Because the ornaments wouldn't be the only things hanging.
What do gay men and drug dealers have in common?
They both get a lot of crack.
His name is Donald, but he looks like Goofy.
My mother-in-law would have been on one of the planes that crashed on 9/11.
Had I known in advance, I would have bought her the ticket.
Yo mama so fat, when she went to a dating service, they ended up matching her up with Pittsburgh.