Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

If depression on crack fucked weed and 69 hours of not sleeping and had a baby with huge amounts of autism, that would be me.

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  • So in prep class, the students were asked to write a letter to their grandparents for Grandparents Day.

    Little Johnny's friend, Little Sally, wrote things like, "Thank you," and, "You are so nice!" And Little Johnny goes, "What are you doing? You got it wrong!" So Sally says, "What do you mean? It's a letter." Little Johnny says, "Why did you do it like that? Just write a letter from the alphabet like the teacher said!" Then he says, "I wrote a J to remind them of me!"

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  • You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.

    You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.

    You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.

    Roast

    I'm not saying you're annoying. But if rectal herpes were a person, it would be you.

    I asked for emotional support. They handed me a mirror and said, "Talk to someone who cares."

    Dead Hooker

    Why can't you kill a hooker?

    Because they're dead inside anyway.

    Twin Towers

    Why is 10 afraid?

    Because it’s in the middle of 9/11.

    Hellen Keller

    What is Helen Keller's son's name? Hrrrrrrr.