Worst Jokes Ever
Roses are red,
Potatoes are brown,
Your mom's so hot,
I put her down.
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Why couldn't the orphan go on the school field trip?
Because it required a parent's signature.
Why don't orphans have any friends?
Because they don't have homies.
How are you and an orphan similar?
Both of your fathers are invisible.
If a bike is also called a bicycle, then what is a test also called?
A tEsTiClE!
Yo mama so fat that the US (Mexico) and North Korea (South Korea) got into a war fighting over who gets to use her as their border wall.
I ordered a pizza with everything on it, but I got a plain pizza.
Today when I looked in the mirror, I stopped and simply said: "It's ok, what's inside matters the most, right?"
Orphans bake bread with what kind of flour?
Self-raising.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad left and never came back home with the milk.
The twin towers are like your father, they're both gone and will never come back.
Do you want drugs? Buy KFC; poor people.
A son walks up to his dad and says, "I'm so gay right now!"
"HOW COULD YOU? I THOUGHT YOU WERE STRAIGHT!!!" screams the dad.
"No, gay as in HAPPY," says the confused son, "I'm so happy right now!"
"Oh," says the dad, "why are you happy?"
Then the son said, "Because I just got 20 dollars for sucking a guy off."
Roses are red, violets are blue, get the f*ck out, I’m trying to poo!
Today I put the women’s rights book in the fantasy section of a library.
There are 206 bones in the human body, but I’d really like to have 207.
Technoblade should have drank milk. Would have gotten rid of all his status effects!
"Poor old fool," thought the gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. He invited the old man inside for a drink.
The gentleman asked, "So how many have you caught today?"
The old man replied, "You're the eighth."
If someone with a lisp dropped a hammer on their foot, would they be Thor?