Worst Jokes Ever

Did you hear? There is a new toy for boys ages 2-10. It's called Jackson. A tiny white doll, with black Jackson. Get it while supplies last.

How do women hold their liquor? By the ears.

World leaders are so old, they've got nostalgia for the Cambrian explosion.

USA: "Never forget 9/11."

Brits: "What happened on the 9th of November?"

If you go to someone's house and see the flag of the former Soviet Union hanging on the wall,

that's a big red flag!

A Russian wedding should be called a Soviet Union.

Michael Jackson was the King of Pop until he got burned by Pepsi. Now, Pepsi is the hero, and now, we know the rest of the story.

What is Michael Jackson's favorite movie?

The Boy in the Plastic Bubble? Why? The boy who was in the bubble.

What does Michael Jackson say when he gets hard? Ow!

What does Michael Jackson say when he grabs his crotch? I never noticed that before.

What do you call a crazy lesbian?

Fruit Loops.

What was the last thing to go through the minds of 9/11 jumpers?

Their ankles.

I told my therapist I feel suicidal. He charged me in advance.

Called a homeless kid 'Spider-Man' because he had no way home.

What is a vegetarian's favorite song?

No beef.

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.

One turns to the other and says, "I think I've lost my electron."

The other asks, "Are you sure?"

"Yes," the first says, "I'm positive!"

Turn the comments into a school shootout ;)

"The naked man fears no pickpocket."

- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.

"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."

- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*

"You may not rest, there are monsters nearby."

-Sun Tzu, The Art of War.