Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

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Me traveling back in time to tell Americans there will be a big tsunami on 9/11/2001, and to survive it they have to climb the two tallest buildings in New York.

My wife and I watched The Perfect Murder together. Excellent movie, but what disturbed me though was my wife constantly taking notes.

Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick Jill’s candy, but Jack got a shock and a mouth full of cock ‘cause Jill’s real name is Randy.

Yes, this joke is stolen.

You walk into a McDonald's and you ask for some extra mayo, and they put too much on there.

I say I didn't order a "McCumshot."

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    • I called the Chinese takeaway yesterday. A man picked up the phone and said: "Hello! I am Wan Kin, the chef." I said that I'll come back later.

  • 3

    • How did Fortnite record their henchman sounds?

    They asked a bunch of kids with Down syndrome to film a documentary.

    My dad's the oldest, and when he was young, he shot my grandpa's balls off, but I thought about it. How does my dad have younger brothers?

    "Why is it that orphans only play tennis?""That's the only love they can get..."

    Little Johnny went to the doctor to get an infection checked on his penis. As the doctor examined it, he asked, "Lil Johnny how did you get an infection on your penis?" Johnny replied, "Well, the damn neighbor Sally's braces are too sharp."

  • 2

    • Ninety percent of your beauty can be removed with a Kleenex.

    Oh, were you talking to me? I thought you only talked behind my back.

    Hold still, I am trying to imagine you with a personality.