Worst Jokes Ever
My mind was blown when I saw all the people waving at me.
-JFK
Broccoli says, "I look like a tree."
Walnut says, "I look like a brain."
Cashew says, "I look like a kidney."
Banana says, "Can we change the topic please?"
Doctor: "Does your penis burn after intercourse?"
Patient: "I don't know. I never tried lighting it."
what's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? the trampoline doesn't cave in when i jump on it.
What's the difference between Clint Eastwood and anal sex?
One will make your day, and the other will make your hole weak.
What is an orphan's favorite show?
Batman.
What was Hitler's lucky number?
Nein.
What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.
My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!
Why didn't Trump beat Biden?
Because he couldn't trump that bitch!
People always told me to open doors for elders. So I opened the plane door 5,000 feet up in the air for a grandma.
What do you call a rapper in a wheelchair?
Young Boy Never Walk again.
This dwarf was being mean to me, so I said, "When you get home, I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you."
What do you get if you cross diarrhea with incest?
I don't know.
Neither do I, but it runs in the family.
Me: Hey, are your parents home?
Orphan: (crying) Stop calling here!
When the school shooter breaks into your classroom, so you try to say goodbye to your Roblox gf, but then the shooter's phone goes off.
Why can't orphans never run all the bases in baseball? Because they can never make it home.
Don't be scared of skeletons.
They don't have the guts for murder.
What do you call a whore with a runny nose?
...Full!
There is nothing funnier than my life. (Evan 2020)