Worst Jokes Ever
What did one tampon say to the other tampon when they walked by each other on the street?
Nothing. They were both stuck up cunts!
A pedophile and a little boy are walking into the woods late at night. The little boy says, "I'm scared." The pedophile says, "You think you're scared? I have to walk back alone!"
A lot of things have changed since I got my girlfriend pregnant.
My name, my address, and my phone number.
A feminist asked me how I view lesbian relationships.
Apparently, "in HD" wasn't a good answer.
The more suicidal people there are, the less suicidal people there are.
Q. How does a girl from Alabama know when her mom is on the rag?
A. She can taste it on her brother's cock.
Why did the picture go to jail?
Cause it was framed!
One day, an orphan threw a boomerang, and it didn’t come back like its parents.
A woman's husband has a yearly conference. The first night he's away from home, their teenage son Tommy comes into their room at night and starts to make love to her, but she knows that it can be dangerous to wake a sleepwalker, so she doesn't say anything. He does this every night for two weeks and stops when his father comes home.
She realizes she's pregnant and has a baby boy.
The next year the same thing happens, she gets pregnant again, and has a baby girl.
The third year, she's feeling very guilty, and after thirteen nights of incredible passionate lovemaking she sits Tommy down and tells him, "Every time your father leaves town on business, you sleepwalk into my bedroom and make love to me. Bobby and Anna aren't just your brother and sister, you're their father!"
Tommy said "You think I was sleepwalking?"
What do you call numbers that don’t stay in place?
Roamin’ Numerals.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they have someone to call father.
Why can't a t-rex clap? Because it's dead.
Last night I burned down an orphanage.
There was one survivor who said I would regret it. I said, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"
My teacher gave us an assignment, and one of the questions was "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
I answered, "Happy."
The teacher said I didn't understand the test. I said to her that she didn't understand life.
Yo mama is so fat, when she got on the scale it said, "One at a time, please."
My favorite sex position is the JFK. I splatter all over her while she screams and tries to get out of the car.
How do you know when a woman is going to have a black baby?
When she takes the tampon out, all the cotton is picked.
Yo mama so dumb, she got hit by a cup and told the police she got mugged.
Why do feminists believe that they can act like a bitch towards men if they want to? Because they were born without a penis.
What is a pedophile's favorite dating site?
Kinder