My ceiling isn't the best... But it's up there!!!!
There was a women from ealing, she had a peculiar feeling, she laid on her backk, opened her crack and pissed all over the ceiling
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and was thinking to myself, "Where the f*ck is my roof?"
What do Michaelangelo and Hitler have in common?
They both used their brain to paint the ceiling
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says "If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone's drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try?" the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.
im jealous at me led lights. cause they r hanging from the celling ans im not.
A man goes into heaven and there he meets jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says "that is mother teresa's clock it has never moved because she has never lied". "There is Abraham Lincolns clock. He has .lied twice so it has moved twice." "Where is Donald Trump's?" Ask's the man. Jesus answers "it is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."
I like my kids how I like my lights, Hanging from the ceiling
How do you start a rave in Africa? stick a pizza onto the ceiling.
What do Children and lights have in common? They both hang from ceilings! Not funny, here’s another Why can’t China play baseball? They ate the bat
I woke up one night and it was really dark in my room, then my T.V. started to float out the window. I said "drop it nig-"
What do Phillips adam and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling
what do you ay to a depressed person on the ceiling?
hang in there!
how do you get a black kid to stop jumping on your bed?- put velcro on the ceiling
One night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars. As I lay there, I thought to myself: WHERE'S THE ROOF!
I bought a ceiling fan the other day.
It was a complete waste of money.
He just stands there applauding and saying
"Ooh, I love how smooth it is."
If i don't get a partner for Christmas this year, mistletoe won't be the only thing hanging from the ceiling.
You look good now, but you’d look better hanging from my ceiling. ;)
my ceiling fan isnt the only thing thats going to be hanging tonight
