It's better being depressed and suicidal than being happy, know why? Happiness never lasts forever.
Worst Jokes Ever
Me: I found a group of furries in the woods.
Voice in back: Well, it looks like we're going huntin'.
My dick was in the book of world records.
But then the librarian asked me to take it out.
Orphans go on vacation to the ancient pyramid to find a mommy.
I was walking down the street and saw a kid and I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents at first."
What’s a kidnapper's favorite shoe brand?
White vans.
I asked a kid at my work where his parents were. He started crying. Man, I don't know what I did. I'll ask another kid at the orphanage.
What did one depressed kid say to the other?
Hey, wanna hang together?
Someone at school asked what makeup I was wearing.
I said, "a smile."
They are now following me around asking if my mental health is okay.
My plan to avoid them is to not go to school.
Going to school is mandatory in this country.
Can you guess my plan?
My dad’s nickname for me is ‘Tiger’.
Now, my wrists look like a tiger.
A cow went into a pride of lions' territory.
Since that moment, he knew his life was on the stake.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
One if you throw it hard enough.
Michael Jackson broke his window. What does he say? "I can't see."
Help, my ADHD is so bad that not even I can focus in a concentration camp.
What are Michael Jackson's pronouns? "He he."
In honor of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as other establishments, are introducing the Jackson dog. It's a 50 year old sausage between two 7 year old buns, with everything on it.
Why does Michael Joseph Jackson love Boise?
Because of all the boys he'll see.
They should bring Michael Jackson back from the dead so he can star in the Peter Pan horror movie.
How do rappers keep themselves clean?
They drop SOAP BARS.
What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?
It's legal to get stoned.
