Worst Jokes Ever
Donald Trump wants to ban the sale of pre-shredded cheese.
He wants to make America grate again.
How is the business in Ukraine? It's booming.
I got mad at my sister's boyfriend, so I fucked his girl.
Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me. It means a lot.
Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.
What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat miner.
What is Mozart doing right now? -- Decomposing.
I saw a sign that said “Watch for children” and I thought, “That sounds like a fair trade.”
Bully: "Shut up and give me your money, otherwise I will tell everyone that you are still a virgin."
Boy: "Haha, I am not a virgin anymore."
Bully: "Haha, nice joke."
Boy: "If you don't believe then ask your sister or brother."
Bully: "Hah, I don't have any sibling."
Boy: "Will just wait for 9 months then u will know."
I didn't come into the prostitution business...
It came into me.
If you don't like my suicidal jokes, sorry man, didn't know it cut that deep.
I made a video game about a depressed, self-harming goth.
It's mostly unskippable cutscenes though... :/
Urban areas are filled with terrorists, feminists, liberals, and murderers. Which one is not like the others? Murderers because they don't pretend to have a cause.
Guy: "My life is like a game, I should end it."
Guy 2: "Is it a hard life?"
Guy: "Yup"
Guy 2: "Then you can't kill yourself LOL"
Guy 3: "Hold on, I know a cheat code to finish the 'game'"
Once again, RIP Daniel Kyre, he actually died this day five years ago.
He attempted suicide Sep 16, and was in life support, till his parents made the tough decision of taking him off.
We will miss ya bud..... (cyndagoooooooo)
Getting murdered by someone is probably the most intimate experience I'll ever have.
Best way to stop a fight between deaf people?
Just turn off the lights.
Why did the blind man fall down the well?
He just couldn't see that well.
A husband got a message from his neighbor one day. It read, "Hey, I'm sorry I had to tell you like this but I have been doing your wife for months now." The husband went to go grab his gun and shot his wife. He hid the evidence and a few hours later he got another message from his neighbor saying, "Sorry, meant using your wifi."
Kobe Bryant jokes just don't really fly well now.
What's the best thing about 28 year olds?
- There's 20 of them.