How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They just hold it in the socket and expect the world to revolve around them.
Worst Jokes Ever
Stop it! What if a blind person sa- oh wait, never mind, carry on.
I was in a haunted house today. Nothing scared me until I reached the last room, where I saw the scariest Halloween ghost I've ever seen. He took my pens and ghosted. I was told that I saw Pristiano Penaldo and I was lucky enough to see him because he performs once in a blue moon.
Q: What kind of club do roosters go to? A: The Chicken Strip.
I made that one up.
What is black and at the top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking after a house fire.
Follow me if you need advice, or just follow me.
Maths...
....Addition, frustration, subtraction, aggression, depression.
How do you light up a football stadium? With a football match.
You know why emos get excited playing Minecraft? They see a creeper.
I once had an emo friend doing a course for the marines. He made the cut.
When the quiet kid has an argument with the school shooter, and you didn't get to pull out the AK.
Where does the keyboard go to dinner? The space bar.
Doctor: I've got good news and bad news.
Patient: What's the good news?
Doctor: I've got you flowers.
Patient: Awww, What's the bad news?
Doctor: They're for your grave.
What instrument can a skeleton not play? An organ!
What instrument can a skeleton play? A Trombone!
Roses are red, potato chips are savory...
The United States prison system is legalized slavery.
Why does the military recruit orphans?
Because homing missiles don’t target them.
What's a joke that an orphan has never heard before?
A dad joke.
What does the suicidal person say on New Years?
"New year, no me."
I was laughing my ass off when the 12-year-old child realized the door to my basement was unlocked, and he didn't need to cannibalize his two friends in a desperate attempt for survival. 🤣🤣🤣
I told my new girlfriend that my mother is deaf.
So she would have to speak loudly and slowly.
I told my mother that my new girlfriend is disabled. Now we wait.
