Worst Jokes Ever
Yo mama is so ugly, she is the reason Slenderman has no eyes.
I did a good job of being home from school.
Why did the tangerine copy off other people's work?
Because the tangerine was unORANGEinal!
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
To get to the bottom.
What do you call an artist with a brown finger?
Picasshole.
My lesbian friends bought me a nice watch for my birthday. I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch."
JFK and Abe Lincoln were some of the most open-minded presidents ever.
What did the wizard say when he was filling up the gas tank? "Expensive Petroleum!"
What do you call a wizard who can't secure a girl? Fumbledore.
Your mamma is so dumb, she went to the dentist to get Bluetooth.
My jokes are so dark that I am surprised that the cops didn't shoot them yet.
The only thing funnier than the shooting of that healthcare CEO is imagining the look on his wife's face when she got the hospital bill.
Q. What do a one-story house and an Alzheimer's victim have in common? A. Nothing going on upstairs.
What gets long when you put it, slides into holes, and likes to squeeze between boobs?
A seatbelt.
What show would have made Michael Jackson a superstar for television? To Catch a Predator, for obvious reasons.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thought Shrek was ugly, until I saw you.
What do you call a person in America that is not a retard?
A foreign exchange student.
You're so bald that when you wear a poncho, you look like a broken condom.
Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.
The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...
Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?