Worst Jokes Ever
A black guy walks into a store to buy some watermelon and fried chicken. The cashier says, "That'll be $20." He pulls out his wallet, but it's empty. Suddenly, a bigger black guy bursts in, grabs him, and says, "Time to pay up, n***a!" Then he bends him over the counter and fucks him in the ass.
When and where was the biggest BBQ ever?
Hiroshima, Japan 1946.
There once was a man named Dave who dug up a prostitutes grave, she was as moldy as shit and missing a tit, but think of all the money he saved
Your mama's so fat, she runs a trade deficit with food!
The earth used to be flat.
Till they buried yo mama.
Why were the Twin Towers angry?
They ordered pepperoni, but they only got plane.
I fucked your mom, oh wait, you don't have one.
If you take an emo kid grocery shopping.
You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
Oooh, I fall apart. Oooh, yeah, mmhmm. She told me that I'm not enough, yeah, And she left me with a broken heart, yeah. She fooled me twice and it's all my fault, yeah. She cut too deep, now she left me scarred, yeah. Now there's too many thoughts goin' through my brain, yeah, And now I'm takin' these shots like it's Novocaine, yeah. Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Never caught a feelin' this hard Harder than the liquor I pour Tell me you don't want me no more But I can't let go Everybody told me so Feelin' like I sold my soul Devil in the form of a whore Devil in the form of a whore You said it No, you said it No, you said it We'd be together Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Ice keep pourin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' Covered in scars and I can't help showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin' Ice keep droppin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' All these scars, can't help from showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin', yeah Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought.
Why did an old man fall in a well?
Because he couldn't see that well.
I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere!
SpongeBob did 9/11.
What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.
Me: How does this thing work?
ForTnite kid: Oh, you don’t know how to use a pistol? Look, I’ll show you.
ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*
Me: That wasn’t a very good demonstration.
If a furry looks like an animal, sounds like animal, and acts like an animal, can I run over it with my car like an animal?
My favorite kind of face mask is the plastic bag.
Why is a priest different from acne?
Acne waits to come on your face.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can’t be found.
I was digging a hole in my garden, then I found a treasure chest. I was so happy. I went to tell my wife, but then I remembered why I was digging a hole.
How did the pornstar cut herself while using a drill?
She was too used to grabbing the tip.