Worst Jokes Ever
There's at least 856 pages of these newest puns. I couldn't finish, because it took me an hour just to get that far. Just saying, that's a lot of jokes!
I had sex, but ended up going "uuyaahh!"
Yo mama is so fat that every step she takes in the ocean creates a tsunami!
I went on a ballooning holiday recently. I put on four stone.
It's hard to tell if people are interested in joining my Sarcastic Club or not.
Why are orphans different from apples?
Apples get picked.
Kyler, go on this one.
5 knock knock jokes from best to corny.
1. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Needle. Needle who? Needle little help getting in the door.
2. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Scold. Scold who? Scold outside, let me in!
3. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Mikey. Mikey who? Mikey isn't working, can you let me in?
4. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Says. Says who? Says me, that's who!
5. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Voodoo. Voodoo who? Voodoo you think you are, asking all these questions?
"Hipity hopity, get the f*ck off my property!"
Why can’t orphans eat big bags of chips?
Cause they're family size. ✌🏻😂🤣😅🥲
Yo mama so stupid, she couldn't comment on this website because she didn't know the 2x4 check!
The waiter comes and asks you for the check. Instead I give him a 20 dollar bill and say, "Boy, you can keep it!"
Who thinks Kenya's dancing is bad and wrong and no?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Today was like every other day. It was so terribly long and so terribly dreary. I fear these feelings will never end. I’ll always feel so dark, feel so hopeless. Sometimes all I want is for it to end. For all of it to end, for all of my thoughts to end. I despise the way that always comes to mind. But I feel so lost, feel so hopeless. If something would just work. But nothing has worked. Nothing can fix this. These feelings will pass. These days won't feel so endless... or so absolutely heavy. Just give it some time. Just give it some hope... and some belief. The ‘happy pills’ will work. The doctor says they'll help... they'll help it go away. Just dump the pill in your hand. Let yourself place the little white thing on your tongue... Let yourself throw your head back and swallow. It'll make this better. It should make me feel better.
Everything has changed! The world is so bright— The world is so loud! I don’t know how I never noticed! The sun is so warm— The grass is so green! I feel so awake! I feel so content— I feel so happy! It’s so strange! I’m not anxious— I’m not overthinking! I guess those pills really worked! I think I’m really getting better— I think I’m really going to be happy!
You know how girls say, "I would have sex with you if you were the last person on earth"? Well, who's gonna stop me?
"I love you with all my heart."
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
'Cause mommy never gave them some.
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide!!! 😂