Worst Jokes Ever
Why is Johnson's baby shampoo the best lubricant for anal sex?
- No more tears.
Why can’t the employee tell dirty laundry jokes?
Because they always come out clean.
What's the difference between necrophilia and a choking fetish? 15 seconds.
Why does the adopted kid like playing GTA? Because he wants to be wanted.
What do you call a guy with no arms and legs, at your front door?
Matt.
I met a kid with Down syndrome the other day. He told me he was into rock music. He told me his favorite song was "Down With The Syndrome." Kinda drooled while attempting to sing it.
Say no to drugs, kids. Suddenly, the poster disappeared. I hallucinated. Must have been the cocaine.
Why did the police go to a baseball game?
Because a player stole the base.
Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.
I'm so gay I could barely think straight.
How do you know when a football player has been to jail?
When he goes in a tight end and comes out a wide receiver.
Stop hating on pedos; at least they drive slow in a school zone, smh 🤣
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his wife changed the WiFi password.
What is the pedophile's favorite shoe?
White vans.
Alex: Dad, can we get me a little brother from the orphanage?
Dad: Sure, Alex! We're here!
Orphanage manager: Alex! You are so big now!
Alex: Dad, what is she talking about?!
I went on a walk with a super pretty girl, then she saw me and it turned into a run.
Autistic jokes have been very popular recently. In other words, I've been very popular recently.
Why do short people laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
Q: What is the difference between a battery and a woman?
A: A battery has a positive side.
What do you call an avocado that got shot? Glockamole.