Worst Jokes Ever
It's opposite day today. I'm gonna tell an orphan that their parents are here.
what do you call it when a person dies in Panera Bread?
Panera dead.
What did one orphan say to the other orphan?
"Robin! Jump in the Batmobile."
Q: Why do orphans love boomerangs?
A: Because they actually come back.
What is Alabama’s family tree? A circle.
What do you call a lesbian with braces? A box cutter.
A friend of mine used to be morbidly obese, but after lots of exercise and hard work... We were able to lift his coffin.
People say killing two birds with one stone is a good thing, but when I did it, people just looked horrified.
Yo mama so fat it took Thanos 2 snaps.
"Doctor, I'm shrinking!"
"Well, you'll just have to be a little patient."
What show does an orphan hate the most? Modern Family.
Mother Nature deserves a traffic ticket.
Summer is speeding by way too fast. 🤣🤣🤣
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other side.
If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have?
Big hands.
What do you call an orphan family tree?
A tree stump.
When the school shooter says, "Everybody get down!" and the autistic kid thinks it's Simon Says: 🙋♂️🙋♂️🙋♂️
A fat girl was dancing on the table, and I said, "Nice legs." She says, "You really think so?" And I say, "Yes, definitely, most tables would have been broken by now."
A patient visiting his doctor asked him if he had ever laughed at a patient.
The doctor said, "I have never in 25 years of practice ever laughed at a patient."
Reassured, the patient drops his trousers and underpants.
Immediately the doctor burst out into loud raucous laughter when he sees that the patient has a penis the size of a cocktail sausage.
After about 10 minutes the doctor manages to get himself under control.
Swiftly apologising he says to the patient, "Sorry about that. How can I help you?"
The patient says, "Have you got any cream for it? It's swollen."
What do you call a bunch of sheep rolling down the hill?
A. A lamb slide.
What does a freshly pregnant teen and her baby share?
They both think, "Mom's probably going to kill me."