I was at an emotional wedding. The cake was in tiers.
Worst Jokes Ever
So a blind man walks into a bar.
At least he thinks so.
So my teacher's daughter committed suicide.
One day I'ma go up to her and say, "What's wrong, did Logan Paul leave your daughter hanging?"
what song did people in Hiroshima listen to?
"Here Comes the Sun."
What’s the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby?
Dogs only lick peanut butter off private parts.
I got my son a trampoline for his birthday. The ungrateful cunt sat in his wheelchair all day.
Me: I know why you don't have friends.
Kid: Why?
Me: Because you can't even figure that out.
Why does no one look up at Steven Hawking?
You have to look down to see him.
Jesus said to his disciples, "Go forth and ye shall receive eternal life." Thomas came fifth, however, so he only got a toaster.
A middle schooler and his dad were at a drugstore. The boy picked up a pack of 3 condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said, "They're for high schoolers: 1 for Friday, 1 for Saturday, and 1 for Sunday." The boy then picked up a 6 pack of condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said, "They're for college students: 2 for Friday, 2 for Saturday, and 2 for Sunday." The kid then picked up a pack of 12 condoms and asked his dad who they were for. The dad said, "They're for married men: 1 for January, 1 for February..."
Be warned, if you are in the shower, I might pikachu and it's not my fault if I see any jigglypuffs.
What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.
Can we stop talking about 9/11? I lost my dad in it.
He was a great pilot.
I would make a joke about your mom, but cows are sacred in my country.
Don’t cry when you attend my funeral, I was dead long ago so why cry now?
What's the only thing with 4 legs Asians don't eat? A table.
Dark humor is like water.
Not everybody gets it.
What do you call a white duck?
A quacker.
Why was Michael Jackson at Kmart?
He heard they had little boys' pants 1/2 off.
I hope you get raped by a chimp in the forest
