Worst Jokes Ever
I don't like it when people make jokes about 9/11, because we lost 19 great patriots that day.
What does a duck and a tablespoon have in common?
Both are not a lamp.
What's a popular name in China? Curiosity, because curiosity killed the cat.
How do you recover from prostate cancer surgery?
It’s all Depends!
You don't want to know why it takes so long to put a dead woman in a mass-produced coffin in a pre-buried grave dug by machinery that is then filled by mourners.
Guns don't kill people, black people kill people.
My infant drew on the walls today, but I don’t know how to punish them. So I think I’ll sleep on it.
If museums are full of dead things...
Then why aren't there any memes inside them?
What's the difference between a piano and a fish?
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!
What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
I can only fit three fingers inside the bowling ball.
Fortnite is good.
(Awesome joke, right?)
Yo mama is so poor, I saw her kicking a can and I asked her what she was doing and she said moving.
When you are f***ing your girlfriend and then she tells you that you f**k like your guys' dad.
Then you f**k your mom and she says the same thing.
I like my women like I like my coffee: nice, fresh, and dead.
Spell "I cup..." "I see you pee!"
Anyone who says they don't like cats has never had one cooked right...
Patient: “Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.”
Doctor: “Next time, take off the candles.”
A kid named Billy gets his lunch money stolen at school. The bully later gets his allowance, the lunch money, and his wallet taken by his father.
The father then gets all the money taken from him by the bully’s grandfather along with his own wallet. The grandfather then takes the money and gets it stolen by Billy along with his own wallet.
I was going to an expensive dinner with my friend's girlfriend because she really wanted to go, but he just got out of surgery, and he said take care of her, so I said, "Will do, bro. I’ll bring her back fuller than a topped-up water bottle."
Why did Steven Hawkins die?
Because he got a virus.