Worst Jokes Ever
The real reason Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
Why can't you tell a joke in a corn maze?
Because there's too many ears.
What's worse than throwing a baby off a cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
What do they call me when I jack off?
Pulled pork.
What do French ducks say?
Quoi quoi.
A guy and a woman are walking into a forest. The woman says she is lonely. The guy then says, "Don't worry, there will be a third person in a little while."
I stole a wheelchair from a disabled kid. What is he going to do, stand up?
Taking an emo kid grocery shopping does have its perks.
You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
Why do US suck at chess? We lost both our towers.
Why is England so good at chess? They still have their queen.
Why does Russia suck at chess? They only have pawns.
One day I was on my phone, then I got a text message from my girlfriend, "Hey, sexy boy, wanna hang out tonight if you know what I mean...?" Then I just stopped and froze. I read the message. I said, "Yeah, sure..." She replied really fast, "There's going to be a few people there, ok." But I didn't read the next message... She said, "Come right at 12:00 AM." But I didn't read it. I walked into her house, but I heard a strange noise like a moaning noise, and it sounded like HER!! So I hid behind the couch, and I looked through the open door and saw something I didn't want to see... Like for part 2 and comment if you want me to make another!!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? One, you just need to throw it hard enough.
What do cows use to do their homework? A cowculator.
A friend texts to another:
"Hey." They reply, "What's up?"
The first friend then replies with a simple answer, "The sky!" But the other friend intervenes and says, "No, it's the ceiling!"
To then the first friend finishes the greeting with, "Unless you're homeless or six feet under."
What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Get in the car.
How does a blonde turn the light off after sex?
She closes the car door.
There was a guy how had a stroke, eh.
He's all right.
Why did Snow White get kicked out of Disneyland?
She sat on Pinocchio's face and said: "Lie to me! Lie to me!"
I like my women like I like my chocolate.
Edible.
I would try to make a Fortnite joke, but I can't seem to build on it.
My cat got in a fight. It was a catastrophe.