Worst Jokes Ever
Children in the dark make mistakes.
Mistakes in the dark make children.
I tend to think my ‘depression’ is for attention. I guess I have depressed depression.
What do you call Amber Heard crying during the lawsuit?
A DEPPression.
(If you are a fan of either Johnny Depp or Amber Heard, you might get the joke).
Your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory.
Stormtrooper: What should we do with this coffee?
Palpatine: Brew it!
If hay is for horses, what is for unicorns?
Haaaaaaay!
What was Frankenstein's second job? -- He was a bodybuilder.
If you ever get mad at a person that crumpled their leg, don't forget that they can hide, but they can't run.
Apparently, rock bottom has a basement.... :\
What do you call a passport for Mandalorians?
A Pre Visa!
A poster for the winter relief fund reads: "No one should be allowed to go hungry or suffer from the cold." A worker says to his friend, "Now were not even allowed to do that."
How many hookers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, cause they'll screw anything.
Girls are like volcanoes.
You never know when they will erupt.
Seat belts are like the condom for cars.
Sir, I mustache you a question...
Ah, never mind, I'll just shave it for later.
what do you call a flat road named after George Floyd?
Flat neck road.
How did Michael Jackson get away with it?
He's a smooth criminal.
Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.
"Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.
What do you call a smart blonde?
Nonexistent.
I don't understand why, when I went to the shooting range today, the police came. Like, bro, I always go to elementary schools.