Worst Jokes Ever
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are actually picked.
My hair strainer is hotter than you.
What's so special about bullets?
They do work after they are fired.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts to do it.
How did the farmer find his lost cow? He tractor down.
Why didn’t the bike stand on its own?
It was too tired.
Teacher: "I'm sorry, but you got a 74 on the test."
Quiet Kid: "I'll show you my own 74."
Classroom: *visible panic*
Look, I didn't hit rock bottom. I gracefully floated down there like Mary Poppins with an umbrella.
What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.
I've been trying to find jokes about gouging my eyes out, but I couldn't see any.
Father O'Reilly ran into a young woman whose mother attended his church at the market. "Ah, Mary Agnes, congratulations!"
She gave him a puzzled look. "On what?"
"Your mother tells me you've been praying to St. Gerard and finally got pregnant, it's a miracle."
Mary Agnes sighed. "My mother needs to get hearing aids if she's going to eavesdrop on my phone calls to friends. I said it'll be a miracle if I get pregnant since the only thing I'm fucking is a St. Bernard."
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child?
The washing machine doesn't cry when you put a load in it.
WOW this ultra realistic jenga is awesome!🔥🔥
Why do Black people go to a confession stand at the Catholic Church?
They wanna know what it’s like to speak to a father.
What’s the difference between dark jokes and cotton?
Some people don’t pick it.
How do you make a pool table laugh? Tickle its balls.
The population in Ireland's capital started rapidly growing. In fact, it's Dublin!
Why does Michael Jackson like spaghetti? He likes the little meatballs.
Tried committing suicide last night...
Never doing that shit again, I almost killed myself!
what's the difference between an emo and an apple? the apple falls to the ground while the emo just hangs there.