Worst Jokes Ever

Q: Do you know why transgender people are good at being carpenters?

A: Because they have more experience cutting off their wood.

My doctor prescribed a new drug to treat my depression.

It’s called Enditol.

Knock knock. Who's there? Parents. Parents who? That's what an orphan would say.

you play gatcha life more like go get a life.

I know you don't like me, and that implies you need better taste.

I'm not an astronomer, but I'm pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.

I'd give you a nasty look, but it seems like you've already got one.

Your birth certificate should be rewritten as a letter of apology.

You haven't changed since the last time I saw you. You really should.

I went for a job interview today and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."

"Well, I'm your man," I replied. "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."

The way you talk is so slow that they put you in the movie Fast and Furious and changed the title to Slow and Serious!!!😂😂😭

I just wanted to say to never let go of family; they are everything. Never let anyone walk all over you. And if you are with me, like this quote.

My sister is pregnant, I'm gonna be a dad.

Yeah, you can call me daddy, son.

Son: Dad, I think I got a girl pregnant.

Dad: Well, is she already part of the family?

Son: Yes, why?

Dad: Then there’s no need to be worried.

Today in class, I screamed "Jenga!"

We were watching a 9/11 documentary.

What do you call a black person eating chicken, watermelon, and drinking Kool-Aid?

Reality.

Girls are like volcanoes.

You never know when they will erupt.

Stormtrooper: What should we do with this coffee?

Palpatine: Brew it!

Me: I look up to you.

Friend: Wow, thanks!

Me: But in general cuz your so tall.

Seat belts are like the condom for cars.

Your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory.

What do you call a midget psychic that has escaped from prison?

A small medium at large.

Why do bunnies like Bruno Mars? Because he got 24 carrots.

Can we stop talking about 9/11? My dad died, man, but he was a good pilot.

What do you call a kid with Down syndrome on the beach?

A baked potato.